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How to validate props with zod? : sveltejs
Main Post: How to validate props with zod? : sveltejs
verified - Reddit
Main Post: verified - Reddit
How do I begin learning about how to Self Validate?
Main Post:
One of my biggest problems in life is that I seek the validation of others. That of course leads to two big problems.
- Emotional Roller coaster
- When the validation of others dries up and I dont get it, I become depressed and I feel like I have no self worth.
So.. I would love to know how I can begin to change this.
I posted this to depression also. Im looking for as much advice as I can get.
Top Comment: I'm kind of new to reddit, and this is a long comment; I hope it's not out of place. I've been working to become a certified foster parent. I've also been reflecting about the way I usually talk to myself. I tend to focus on regrets, feeling inadequate compared to others, and being kind of down on myself. I can get into a negative spiral, where my negative self-worth seems to sap my motivation to do better today, and this just perpetuates the cycle. So lately, I've tried something new. I imagine that I'm a foster child under my own care. I imagine that my traumatic early experiences have resulted in some less-than-ideal patterns of thoughts and behavior. And now I need to summon all the love, kindness, patience, and wisdom I have, to help this child heal and begin to learn new and better ways of thinking and acting. So for example, if I'm feeling anxious about an upcoming event I need to attend, I might say to myself, "You seem to be feeling anxious. What's bothering you? Are you worried that people won't like you, or that you'll look dumb? You know, I sometimes worry about that kind of thing, too. But I've noticed that actually, most people aren't really judging me so much. I do that to myself. In my experience, most people respond well when I just smile and say hi. Extend your friendship and warmth and kindness, and then just relax, and allow them to respond in kind." If I'm feeling bad about overeating, for example, I'll think about what I've done over the past couple days, and find things to praise. "Wow, I'm really proud of you for getting up early yesterday to exercise. Didn't that feel great? I've noticed that my day gets off to a good start when I get up early and work out - what a mood lifter! You've been doing really well with that!" And then maybe I'll add something like, "I notice that you don't feel as well when you eat too much junk food. I'm so sorry that you're not feeling well. Maybe next time, you'd feel better if you reached for some fruit instead. Would it help you if I washed these grapes and put them out on the counter now, so you'd have them handy when you were feeling like snacking?" If I'm feeling overwhelmed by a big laundry pile, and am tempted to just ignore it, I'll say, "You don't much feel like doing the laundry today, do you? Well, how about if we just spend 5 minutes making a little dent in it? Baby steps like that make a big task feel easier." Then if I actually do it, I say, "Good for you! You're really learning to be more responsible every day! I'm so proud of you!" If I start to get annoyed at somebody or some situation, I might say to myself, "I notice you're getting that tight feeling in your chest that you get when you're starting to get upset. What are you upset about? This line is kind of moving slowly, isn't it? That can be frustrating when you're in a rush. But let's look at the clock. You still have enough time to get to your next appointment. A few extra minutes here won't mess up your day. You're doing just fine. I'm sure the cashier is doing her best. Maybe she's having a stressful day. When we get up in line, let's try to help her day go a little better. Just smile and be kind and patient with her. Wouldn't that be a nice service to that poor lady with this stressful job?" Or let's say I spent too long web surfing, and now I'm feeling like a lazy bum, I'll say something like: "Hmm, I notice you're not feeling too great right now. What do you think is going on? It seems like maybe you feel worse when you spend too long on-line. That's an interesting observation. It can be fun to relax and spend a little time on-line. I wonder what the right balance is. Maybe you could try setting a timer next time, for 15 minutes, or 30 minutes. Then when it rings, you could turn off the computer, and do something else for a while. Then you could see how that affects your mood. Does that sound like a good plan? I just want you to be happy, and I wonder if setting some limits on your screen time might help you feel happier in the long run." If I have a whole day where I'm just really not being my best self, I might say, "You're having a rough day, aren't you? We all have our bad days. That's o.k. That's part of being human. We're all learning and growing together. We're all works in progress. I still love you. You're doing all right. Tomorrow is a new day." I realize this long comment probably makes me sound a little crazy - talking to myself all day, and treating myself like a lost little child. But I feel like it's making a difference in my life. I've noticed that the more I try to be kind and patient with myself, the more peaceful and happy I feel. I'm also getting more done, making better decisions, and I'm more patient with other people, too. I've also started repeating these words to myself a lot - my own little made-up mantra: "There's no one to impress. No one to beat. No one to intimidate or be intimidated by. There's no judge or jury or audience. There's no competition, no performance. There are only people to love. There's only a relationship between a loving God and his beloved child." (I know most people on reddit aren't religious, so feel free to ignore that last bit, if it doesn't resonate with you. But it's been an important part of the puzzle for me, as I've begun to find more peace in my life. As I say these words, I feel the tension and anxiety flowing out of me, and peace and calm flow in.) TL;DR: Be your own loving foster parent. Edit: I'm humbled and overwhelmed and moved by all the beautiful and kind responses to my original comment. Thank you so much to all of you! I wish I had time to respond to each person individually, but for now, just a huge collective thanks to the whole community.
I want to learn how to validate myself.
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I want to learn how to validate myself or how to find worth in myself — that inner strength that pushes people through.
I know the things that are "good" about me, but I can't help feeling that I need other people to validate those things, or my feelings, or even my existence.
I can rationally understand how to process positive thoughts and feelings, but I can't seem to incorporate them into my own sense of worthiness. Are there actual behavioral scripts to follow that will eventually habituate and change my mind?
Top Comment:
You have to know it. It's not enough to believe it - believing that the ocean is made of dirt won't allow you to walk on water. You have to know that you are good, objectively, independent of external perception. But here's the bad news: that means it has to be true. Which means you may have to change some things about yourself, because if you're like most people, you don't live up to all of your values.
Let me give you some advice: spend more time doing something you love. Do you enjoy walking? Building? Writing? Do more of it. Do you want to learn a martial art, to play an instrument, to throw knives? Go learn. Shift the center of your life from relationships to yourself. Be selfish. Spend less time with friends and more time pursuing your passions. One day, you'll find yourself welding a hinge together on a forge you built from scrap metal, and you'll realize that your life is badass and that you're badass, and even if the entire population of the Earth screams the contrary, you're amazing. Your worth is self-evident, and it will astonish you that you ever could have looked to them for validation. (True story, by the way.)
I'm not saying that you shouldn't have friends. I'm saying that friendship shouldn't be a source of validation. At that point, they become a psychological need rather than a choice. I don't need my friends - I chose them. My love for them is a badge of honor. My love is earned. As such, my relationships are fewer these days, but they are more meaningful and fulfilling than any I've ever had.
Good luck.
Reddit, what are your thoughts on validation?
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How much do you care about your html/css validation?
- Do you put more effort into validating personal or client projects?
- Do you care more about HTML or CSS validation?
- Do you find it offensive when a website you visit doesn't validate? Why?
- Do you sell clients on the importance of validation? What do you tell them? Do you charge them extra for it?
- What's your reaction when people tell you one of your pages doesn't validate?
Edit
- What about flash embeds breaking your validation?
- Do you ever consider going to an HTML 5 doctype to reduce your error count? Is that cheating?
Top Comment:
- Both. Validation is a style of programming, not a feature-add
- HTML. CSS, unfortunately, almost always requires hacks to get all browsers playing nice. And when you work on enterprise software and the CTO wants to know why his page looks different on his IE6 browser than everyone else who is using Firefox you give up and just add in some CSS hacks.
- I'm usually not offended. Just disappointed. Kind of like when your parents tell you they're not angry, they're just disappointed.
- It's just part of the package. I charge more than the average guy. As a result I attract only a certain kind of client. Usually these clients are the type to request things like validation.
- If I own the content I'm surprised with a dash of disbelief. If the client owns the content I almost expect it not to validate.
[Advice] You Need to Practice Internal Validation
Main Post: [Advice] You Need to Practice Internal Validation
Top Comment:
On behalf of those in need who are yet to read and hopefully take heed, Gracias for this... for taking the time to breaking it down into simple terms.
That's a Real one for you.
IWTL how to stop relying on validation from others
Main Post: IWTL how to stop relying on validation from others
Top Comment: Let me preface this by saying validation in itself isn't a bad thing, it's when it becomes the sole focus of an individual that it grows into something more malicious. It feels good to have our thoughts, ideas, whole beings validated by an external being. The difference being an independent person may be able to accept their own self-validation when it isn't coming from someone else. Specifically for OP, you talk about different areas of your life, such as career, choices and creative aspects where you feel you can't be proud unless someone validates whatever it is you are doing. I would make an assertion that you aren't trusting yourself in these matters. Building up confidence to trust that you're doing things which are right for you could be somewhere to start. For example micro validations, "yes I want to eat this for lunch" and build up from there. The idea is to work up self belief that your decisions are for you and not for anyone else. Because after all what other people think of you and what you do is irrelevant. As a general point to anyone else reading this of you're looking to break a cycle, try thinking about the specific areas that you're seeking validation for. Are you doom scrolling social media? Literally asking for validation? Pause and think whenever you feel like you're looking for an external validation, make a note of the reasons you're looking and that might help elucidate some solutions to your personal circumstance.
How to validate forms properly? Some useful dos and donts. Additional links in the comments.
Main Post: How to validate forms properly? Some useful dos and donts. Additional links in the comments.
Top Comment: Dont use [email protected] for your examples. This is a real email that can be used by someone. use [email protected] or something with @example as domain. The "example" domain is reserved for this purpose. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Example.com#Purpose
How do you guys validate yourselves?
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I'm a pretty lonely guy and only have relationship with family. Most of the time they aren't very compassionate when I try to talk to them about problems I'm going through. I can't seem to find any validation and struggle to give it to myself. How do you guys fulfill that need?
Top Comment:
Validation of what? Your problems and their existence? You have to work on this internally not seek outside approval (unless we're talking support through therapy to manage/fix said problems). I know it sucks but bottom line no one is required to care about you and your problems. I don't mean to sound callous but it's life. Work on yourself, feel good for yourself.